PETRA: My cousin is in that band.

SASCHA: “Wow.” I’m “impressed.”

P: I’m adrift, I’m entirely adrift.

S: You’re twenty to thirty pounds overweight. Other than that—you’re fine. [A pause.] I forgot what I was going to say.

P: I wish we’d never met.

S: We’ve never met. I’m a stranger. Hallo! Who the devil are you!

P: Stop playing around.

S: You talk like you’re a character in a play. Talk like a real person.

P: “Hallo! Who the devil are you!” Hey rill quick is it cool if I claw your fucking eyes out

S: Yeah go right ahead. [The microwaves beeps. THE BEANS ARE HOT!! GO RETRIEVE YOUR BEANS!!!!]

Later. They’re in their respective homes, on the phone.

PETRA: It’s like you’re not a human being


P: It’s like youre a fucked-up dog-criminal

S: Yesh

P: Making sex to you is like my eyes turn into cauldrons of elmers glue barfing their contents out my cheeks

S: yes, yesh

P: I won’t dog-sit for you while you’re in Africa

S: Fine. I’ll have my dog put down.

P: weeping, no