I have a car
you are a little mouse
you love crackers
whiskers love the crumbs
mealy-mouthed weeping lady
gay vagina, said the laddish little broham. “Spanish loam”
…triple stone fruit sundae,
shamey dog problems, WHAY IS THAT SO DIFFICULT TO MAKE PLANS WITH YOU
later, hey what’s the deal with food
what do you mean
people who aren’t fat, posting photos of food on the internet — what’s it ?
when you are not fat it means you don’t eat as much, so you get really excited about the food you’re eating, more genuine/deeply excited about the food, take a picture of the eggs, damn, that was good, etc, right? see?
yes, when i hear my name spoken from the other room it’s like an angel having sex with my avatar. my na’avi avatar.
I got pissed when you said y5ou were reading a work of erotic fiction, but when i picked it up it was like academic writing, dot dot dot, what happend
I got depressed
I’m sorry Why?
Because you don’t need a reason. Depression is like a fucked-up black faerie wing that just descends.
actually “I’m not entirely sure”
you said on twitter that you would kill the next person who used the phrase “exqueeze me” but I didn’t think you’d actually do it!